Shall I Make Cakes Too?

I have a problem, it’s the complete inability to say no.  Last month the  inability to say no saw me helping out at four different functions, baking a batch of cakes and reading out loud at a meeting.

I don’t mind reading out loud, but when it’s in front of a huge bunch of people quite frankly I’m quaking. So why didn’t I say no, I have absolutely no idea. I was warned I was going to be asked so I can’t even plead the excuse of surprise.

As soon as I saw the person walking towards me my stomach did a little flip-flop whilst I quietly groaned, ” aah just the person I was wanting to see, you couldn’t possibly do a little reading for us today could you?” he asked, although my head, heart and everything else was screaming “NOOOOOO! Run for your life quick!” I felt my mouth say “yes that’s fine, no I don’t mind at all.”

My brother finds my inability to say no hilarious, as far as he’s concerned no should be the first words on your lips, but should it though?

When I helped out at the functions last month I met loads of different people, at the end of the day I was exhausted but it’d been fun and I’d got to have a good natter with the other volunteers.

The same goes for the reading too. The thought of reading out loud in front of people is dreadful, but once I’m up there it’s not so bad and the build up feelings of dread are great writing research! If any of my characters need to do something they are terrified of I’ll definitely know how they’re feeling. 🙂

Maybe it’s not just a matter of saying yes or no but a matter of taking yourself more seriously and carrying a diary that you can check. Making sure you write everything in it, if you write every Saturday between nine and ten pencil it in, so that you can legitimately say I’m sorry I’m busy before ten, but after that I’m free.

Has the inability to say no dropped you in anything you’d rather it hadn’t?

3 thoughts on “Shall I Make Cakes Too?

  1. I was cooking for about 20 elderly folk yesterday because I suffer from the same affliction as you. I always feel better after I’ve done these things though and I know that I’ll never experience life to the full if I always say ‘no’,

  2. I’ve got much better at saying ‘no’ over the years, and it did come down to carrying a diary, and checking it, but also, my tip is don’t let the person asking see your diary! I say this because some folks don’t see your plans as important as their plans. You really don’t want to get into conversation about it…

    I find most folks won’t question you when you turn them down if they see you checking a diary. You also need to grit your teeth and just say ‘no’ now and again. It will become easier after a while.

  3. I know just what you mean – but sometimes if you say no, you end up wishing you’d said yes. The diary sounds like a good idea 🙂 x

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